So I thought I would share the ABSOLUTE worst pick-up line that has ever been used on me. One night during my undergrad, my best friend and I walked out of my apartment. There was a group of men hanging out in the quad. As my friend and I entered the quad all we heard was "Finally, some beautiful black bitches." They then pursued to try and walk us to the shuttle stop while wrapping their arms around us asking for our numbers. It was uncomfortable, to say the least. I decided that to get out of the situation I would pull the lesbian card.
Now, for some this isn't always a safe route, but my friend and I felt pretty secure in our physical ability to take these men out if any violence occurred. So I threw the man's arm from around my shoulder and grabbed my best friend's hand. We increased our speed and yelled back to the group: "We're gay." Now my best friend is straight, but somehow she knew instinctively to play along and IT WORKED! But what I really wanted to say was "don't speak to me like that" or perhaps "show me some respect." But when was the last time you heard a woman respond like that to street harassment?
I later found out that the group of "gentlemen" had been harassing women the whole night, although apparently there were not enough "black bitches" for their liking. I wonder how safe other women felt. I wonder how they dealt with the unwanted attention. But I also wonder how many women are conditioned to just accept this type of behavior or even take it as a compliment.
So help me answer my questions. Comment with your best story about the worst/most uncomfortable pick-up attempt you've experienced. Let's compare notes and share tools for avoiding these blatant violations of decency.
Oh MANNN I never know what to do. Josh and I were talking about a self-defense course at some point in the future when money abound$ (never). I'm always afraid, I can never tell if responding will cause a reaction that might be harmful to me. I wish there was an answer I HATE it
ReplyDeleteExactly! It's really difficult to assess what's safe. I know I wouldn't have reacted the same outside of Ramapo's campus because there isn't that safety net anywhere else. When stuff like this happens, I find myself laughing it off or shaking my head and walking faster. I definitely feel that initial panic, and I know I'm not the only one.
ReplyDeleteIt's not right that women have to constantly experience a sense of panic while performing every day tasks. I wonder if these feelings are different for other people with various gender identities and expressions.